Thursday, September 15, 2011

Happy Birthday

My Mom would have been 56 today. I miss her sunshine in my life. I miss the happiness she brought where ever she went. I will never understand why she had to leave us. It will always be hard to see women my age out shopping with their mothers. I will always think whenever I have a question to "call Mom" and then immediately dismiss the thought in a matter of milliseconds. I will always tell my kids stories about my Mom. I will always look for her sunshine shining through in new ways. Like through Kate's personality. Kate and I went to the cemetary today and ate cake pops and sang Happy Birthday. Happy Birthday is not fun to sing through tears. I told Kate some stories about Grandma Judy and Kate said, "....and she died" after everything I said. But she also said, "Grandma can still see me though." I love how all the flowers that people brought are yellow. She truly was sunshine to all of us! Happy Birthday to the most amazing, wonderful woman I will ever know.

8 comments:

Heather said...

I just finished my post to mom. It's crazy that a day like today can make me miss her so much more, if that's even possible. I'm so glad that I have you! You are a lot like her and I can see her in you so much!! Nothing will ever be the same, but I'm grateful to have our wonderful family and I'm so grateful that families are forever. I'm looking forward to celebrating her life with you in a few weeks. Love you so much!!!

Bamamoma said...

My heart aches and rejoices with you. There are such extremes in emotions. Joy and sorrow coexist so intensely. I'm glad you and Kate could share them together.

Lauren said...

It's hard to know what to say after posts like this--I do know that you and your siblings were so lucky to have such a wonderful mother. Hugs your way!

Karen and Joe said...

My sweet, sweet Jenny. I cannot begin to imagine what you must feel.
Please know that I love you, your family and your dad so much. I also love your mom so much and I can feel her spirit close to me and her laugh still.
Joe says time really doesn't heal. How could it heal such a void left by such an incredible woman?
I thought of Judy all day yesterday, obviously, many others did too.
love ya

Emilee Porter said...

Happy Birthday to one of the most amazing women I have ever met! What a great tribute to your mom. You are exactly right about the Yellow - she brought such sunshine into every single persons life she encountered.

I'm sorry it's so very hard to have her gone. I can't even begin to understand how that would feel. You are so strong though and manage to keep such a positive attitude throughout. Love ya

Daisy Chick said...

What a beautiful tribute to your mom. Her wonderful light shines on in you and your sweet family. I love you dearly.

Katie said...

Beautiful post. I am so glad you share your feelings. I love that Kate is so close to the spirit. She knows your mom is right there with you. As we have to keep trudging through the mess of life and all of its trials and pain your are doing a beautiful job.

Jen said...

Happy Birthday to a wonderful woman! Thank you for sharing this sweet experience.