Adventures in the snow

The last weekend of February was spent on snowmobiles heading into Layne and Sarah's cabin. They are so great to invite us each year and we always have a great time. In spite of such a mild winter, we managed to be up in the mountains the one weekend with lots of snow and crazy wind gusts. I was happy to stay inside with Kate and Richard was wonderful to play with the other kids outside! Plus, the boys were in heaven because Richard let them drive the snowmobiles quite a bit. I think everyone's faces were covered up more often than not, as you'll see from the pictures. We are just grateful for masks and goggles, because it was fuh-reezing! Now that we've had a few good snow days, bring on Spring! I'm ready for a warm up! I'd still love to take my boys skiing this year though.....so snow, you can stay.... but only in the mountains.

Richard and Landon

Me, getting ready to drive out.

Landon

Kate and me

Daniel

Kate, Emma, Richard and Landon

Kate

Emma

The crew getting ready to head in....much nicer than on the way out!

Landon

A nice stop at a little gas station for hot chocolate and beef jerky finally warmed us up. BTW- I think beef jerky and diet coke is a fabulous combination. Try it....you'll like it!

Back on track

I have really neglected my blog lately. Maybe it's because there hasn't been too much going on. Just the usual business and life! We've been going to lots of basketball games and practices. Richard is coaching Landon's team this year and I'm so glad. He has really done a great job and it has meant so much to Landon. I think my next post will be a little update on each of my kids. But for this post, I just want to catch up a little bit and post the few pictures I do have on my camera. I have really been terrible. So here goes.

For Presidents Day we went down to the cabin and played in the snow. It was a beautiful day and the fresh powder made for a really awesome sled run. It was more like a luge because we would really go up the sides with each curve. Since we have snowmobiles our kids have never had to climb back up a hill after sledding. Richard comes and ties all the sleds together and pulls everyone back up the hill. It is really a great way to sled...especially with little ones! Landon, Daniel, Emma, McKenna, Kjerstin and Troy snowshoed into the cabin and broke nice trail.

Here we are being pulled back up the sled run.

Daniel had to rest for a while. He did a very painful looking cartwheel while snowboarding, but his head kind of stayed in the snow. It looked pretty bad and he ended up being okay, just really sore!

Kjerstin, Emma and Kate

Emma and Kjerstin at the top of the sled run

Richard to the rescue. He pretty much stays on the snowmobile the entire time shuttling everyone back and forth.

Daniel- just before the wreck

Landon and McKenna

Rewind a few weeks:

I had to post this. This was Landon's idea. He made the brownies and the goal posts. I did the frosting (not very well!) and printed off all the little players. If you enlarge the picture you will see I did 5 little players (double-sided!) for each team. They were super cute and Landon was really excited to take it to Grandpas for our superbowl party.

Rewind a week:

I made these Valentines for my family and they turned out so cute! They weren't too hard, but I made 10 and those little boxes do take time to put together. I just love them though!

Daniel is very creative and artistic. This is what we came up with for his Valentine box this year. He won in his class for "Most Creative" and I think it turned out pretty awesome! Do you get it? Me hearties? Drink up me hearties yo-ho!

That's it for now. This weekend we will be doing more snowmobiling, so I'll post pictures of that next week. Hopefully now I'll be better at blogging again!

It's the start of another year and I've been missing my Mom a lot lately. Of course, the holidays are always hard, and this was our third Christmas without her. Then just this past week a wonderful lady in our ward passed away after a battle with pancreatic cancer. She reminded me a lot of my Mom and I made sure to take the opportunity to hug her and tell her how much I love and admire her. It is so strange to think that she is now up there with my Mom. Then I read this post over at beneathmyheart.net and it made me cry. She lost her Mom a few years ago to cancer as well. I totally identify with her. I thought I would repost it because it really captured a lot of my own feelings.

Last Friday night, I decided to make some popcorn for my boys while they watched a movie. There were only a few days left of their Christmas break, and we were soaking up some family time.

I LOVE popcorn! So I was so excited to be making some. The popcorn bowls were stored in the lower cabinet by the stove, so I bent down to get them out. As I was reaching for the bowls, my arm hit some of the casserole dishes that were stored in there too, and two of them slid out and fell on the floor with a loud breaking crash.

I froze as I looked down to see what had just happened.

There on the floor lay two broken casserole dishes. Not just any two dishes.

One glass casserole dish used to be my grandmother’s. It still had her handwriting on a piece of tape on the bottom of the dish with her name on it. My mom inherited that dish when her mom passed away. And it was passed on to me when my mom passed away.

The second dish was a gift to me from my mom. It was one of the last birthday gifts I ever received from her. I loved that casserole dish. Every time I used it, I felt mom’s love.

And there it lay on the floor broken.

As I knelt beside the broken dishes, my boys’ came running in the room to see what had made that loud crashing sound.

“What happened, Mom?” they asked.

I could hardly speak.

“Go get Daddy.” I said to my oldest.

Jonathan yelled at Cy to come quick, and then I heard Cy running across the house. He had no idea what had just happened. He was probably expecting to see something terribly wrong, but instead, he just saw me kneeling on the floor by some broken dishes.

He stopped.

“Mom gave me these dishes.” I said through a face full of tears.

“Go in the other room, boys.” He said.

And then without saying a word, Cy came and knelt down behind me, wrapping his arms around me, and I began to sob.

I couldn’t stop crying.

I felt stupid for crying so hard over broken dishes, but I couldn’t stop crying.

We knelt there together without saying a word for several minutes. And then finally I was able to choke out, “I know they are just dishes…. but they are all I have left of Mom.”

Cy got up quietly and got a broom to start sweeping up the broken pieces. I stood up beside the sink and watched as he put the bigger pieces on the stove and swept the smaller pieces in the dust pan.

I still couldn’t stop crying. Those broken dishes had opened up that broken place in my heart where I lost my mom.

I laid my head on the counter top and continued crying. My heart was hurting. I think my heart was extra tender at that moment. For the past few weeks, my heart had been flooded with Christmas memories of Mom, and I had been holding it all in. Christmas just hasn’t felt the same since Mom has been gone.

It’s still special, don’t get me wrong. But boy do I miss her at Christmas.

I was standing in line at a store a couple days before Christmas getting some gifts for my boys, when I overheard a mother and daughter talking at the register beside me. The daughter looked my age, and she had her toddler with her. They were talking about Christmas plans and what gifts they still had left to buy.

All of a sudden, I felt a pain in that broken place in my heart. I remember having those same conversations with my mom just a few years back.

I missed Mom.

When the daughter got up to the cashier to pay for her items, the mom said, “I’ll get this.”

“No, Mom. You don’t have to do that. I’ll get it,” the daughter replied.

“No, no, honey, I’m gonna pay for this,” the Mom insisted.

And again, my heart sank as I handed the cashier my money.

I remember moments like that. When Mom used to help take care of me. When she knew that money was tight and I was doing my best to take care of my boys, and she would say to the cashier, “No. I’m gonna pay for this.” And I felt my mother’s love. That deep, deep love of a mother.

BROKEN.

That’s how I feel sometimes.

Just like my broken dishes.

Cy offered to glue the birthday dish back together for me, and I’m going to let him.

I won’t be able to ever cook in it again, but at least I can put it on a shelf and look at it. He won’t be able to glue it back together perfectly, but good enough.

I’m a lot like that broken dish.

My life may look “good enough” on the outside, but my heart still has broken places in it that can never be fixed.

My mother will never be back. I will not be with her again on this earth.

Broken places.

Do you have them?

Truth is…we all do.

We all have those broken places in our lives where bad things happened to us. Or maybe things didn’t turn out like we had planned. Maybe we have been disappointed by something or someone. Maybe we have things in our past that have left scars on our hearts.

But here is the good news:

Beautiful things can grow in broken places.

source

Beauty has sprung from my broken place.

Though the heartache of losing my mom will never go away this side of heaven, I can honestly say that beautiful things have grown in that broken since then.

I am not who I was before my mom passed away, and I am grateful for that.

In my broken place, I have found a better perspective of what is truly important in life. I have found a deeper walk with Christ. I have found a greater love for family and friends.

Only Christ can bring beauty from our broken places.

source

But we have to let Him.

We have to trust. We have to pray. We have to hide His word in our hearts.

I love the following verse. (I inserted the word brokeness.)

2 Corinthians 12:9

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness (brokeness).” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses (brokeness), so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

God’s love can be made perfect in our brokeness. Praise HIM!

We all are broken, aren’t we? Some of us have little cracks in our lives and some of us have big gaping holes.

My prayer is that as we start this new year together, we would allow Jesus to grow beauty in our broken places.

I do feel broken in many ways, and even though it may not show on the outside all the time, I feel it deeply on the inside. I think I am still looking for ways to have something beautiful come from the broken places in my heart. After Marilyns funeral the other day I sobbed. Kate was the only one home and she came to my rescue. She let me just hold her and cry. She whispered in the softest, most tender voice, "It's okay, Mama." And I felt my Mom's love. Many people commented on her post and wished that they had even a fraction of a relationship like that with their mothers. I am so grateful for the closeness that we shared/share and that she will always be my shining example.

December and the new museum

On December 28th my Grandpa Hague turned 85 years old and took us to the new museum. He is the former director of the Utah Museum of Natural History. I grew up going to "Grandpa's Museum" and loved it. The old museum was closed down and has relocated to this new building on the U of U campus. It was so neat to go through the new museum with him and you could feel the deep passion he has for everything that has gone into building this amazing place.

This is the view from the top of the museum. Even though is was really smoggy, it is still a pretty amazing view!

Grandpa is such a wealth of knowledge and it was such a neat opportunity for us to have him give us the tour.

Such an amazing and massive building!

If you zoom in you can see the orange plaque between them has their names on it. The Donald and Lorna Hague Family.

I used to lay in this very dinosaur print when I was a little girl. It is a vivid memory, so even though this is in a small corner of the museum, it was one of my favorite parts!

The kids really enjoyed all the exhibits and had fun with all the hands on stuff!

Grandpa loves to talk to Richard and Richard is such a great listener. A few times throughout our visit we had to go find them and make them catch up to us! We could have spent all day there with Grandpa, but we had to move at a more kid friendly pace.

The stones and gems were one of my favorite displays in the old museum.

The third floor of the museum is named for my Grandpa and this beautiful painting of him (painted in 1984) is right as you walk off the elevator. He has contributed so much time, talent and expertise to make the museum what it is.

I sure do love these guys, and they have so much love and pride for the museum.

This was one of my favorite parts of the whole tour. It was fun to watch passersby realize that the man we were taking our picture with was the man in the painting!

There was so much to see and my Grandpa knew about every little detail in the whole museum. Amazing. This display case alone has 600 items in it!

Rewind to the beginning of the month:

Emma's school teacher got married and had a reception at the school. Emma was in heaven dancing with her teacher and all her class mates. Her teacher is like a real live Disney princess and Kate thought she really was!

Her teacher is so sweet and Emma loves her so much. Mrs. Barton let Emma keep her bouquet and Emma was beyond thrilled! She felt so special!

Of course, our December is filled with a lot of Voice Male concerts and my kids are always eager to collect the rubber duckies after the shows. Here is their loverly display. And, of course, I didn't get any pictures of Voice Male....only the ducks.

Here is our family on Christmas Eve. After a potato bar dinner with Martinellis , the kids opened their jammies and I remembered that my Aunt Barbara had made these for Richard and me years ago. We looked like dorks, but it was fun. We had a totally awesome dance party and watched "Elf".

Other fun things we did this month:

Attended 2 Voice Male concerts, made lots of goodies (including a fondant cake because we love Cake Boss), had Christmas Eve breakfast at Dave's and went to a movie, wonderful family celebrations with both Hague and McAllister families, spilled hot chocolate all over Kate at a family party, breakfast at IHOP with Grandpa Kevin, ward parties, choir concerts, pack meeting and caroling, playing piano and singing lots of Christmas songs, and enjoying lazy days in jammies, watching movies and playing Just Dance!

We did have a wonderful Christmas. But we only took videos (no pics!) of Christmas morning. The rest of the day was spent making a lot of food, Richard being at church for 3 hours (he's in the bishopric), me being in charge of the Sacrament mtg. program (which actually went very well), and me stressing about it all. I think I wanted to be a kid this year and enjoy the magic of Christmas. But with the whole Sunday thing, I think I was overly stressed and it didn't feel like much of a relaxing Christmas Day, which is what I really wanted. However, we did have a great Christmas. I love my family and we are so very blessed. I think I'm ready for the kids to go back to school. I'm ready to take down the decorations and get my house back in order (well, as much order as possible with all the craziness). Ready to get back into regular blogging again. I guess I'm ready for a new year. I'm not ready to start my diet (again), but I figure I have until Monday to live it up. I'm gonna go have a piece of cake. See ya in 2012!

A little before and after

Here is a little of what I have been up to lately. These kind of projects keep me sane. Back in the spring I swapped kids rooms and painted the girls room light blue. Kate was still in a crib, but we have since gotten bunk beds and I redid the room and love how it all turned out.

I LOVE this mirror from IKEA!

I made all the pillows. I searched everywhere for the "perfect" red and white bold flower print and made the other pillows out of felt. They were really fun and easy!

My goal was to get rid of all pastel pink, purple, and green. I love the yellow, blue, red and black! I still have to recover the dolly crib that is lined with pink gingham.

In their old room these boards used to be pink and purple. I peeled off the vinyl and repainted them and obviously had to have the vinyl reprinted.

Here is the AFTER. I saw a picture that inspired everything. I love that it is unique. Not that I don't love the black/white/hot pink combo, I just wanted something different and I love how it turned out. I still have a few little finishing touches to add, like wood initials above their beds, but overall I am so happy with how it all turned out!

Let's remind ourselves of the BEFORE in all its messy, boy glory!

Here is the AFTER of the kitchen table...sorry the picture isn't too clear. Next I think I'll have to tackle the banister because it kind of clashes with the walnut table top. Slowly but surely, I will phase out all the oak (yuck!) in my house. I also have bathroom vanity cabinets and kitchen cabinets on my list. I've been wanting to paint my table forever and finally did it.

The BEFORE. I was just tired of this look and if you looked close up there were so many stains and scratches. It needed a makeover!

I guess I'll have to put all my other big plans on hold and work on Christmas "stuff"!

Roy and his girlfriend

This summer Kate rode on the float in the Lehi Parade. The theme was "Memories of....Grandpa's Farm". Roy Littleford was the "Grandpa" and Kate got to sit with him on the float. He took good care of her and she loved him. She talks about him all the time. A few weeks ago he called me to ask if he could make something special for his "little sweetheart". He made Kate this little doll table and chairs. He brought the cute plate with it and even made her a card that told her she is pretty and special. It makes me cry that he is so cute to do that. Kate always hugs him when she sees him at church and it is the cutest thing. I love living in a ward that has a great mix of old timers, middle age families and younger families. Our kids benefit so much from having relationships with these great people that have been around forever. Isn't this just the sweetest thing? And what beautiful detail!!